


Faith in me, faith in you, faith in us.

by WafflesAndPancakes



Category: Ski Jumping RPF
Genre: Coming Out, Couch Cuddles, Day Off, Engagement, Established Relationship, Fear of Coming Out, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Kenneth is too afraid to come out, M/M, Rain, They only want to enjoy their days off, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-28 08:08:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19808203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WafflesAndPancakes/pseuds/WafflesAndPancakes
Summary: Anders loves Kenneth. Kenneth loves Anders. They enjoy their day off, watching the rain pour down from the sky. Then, their relationship changes.OrFluff, fluff, and even more fluff.





	Faith in me, faith in you, faith in us.

**Author's Note:**

> I was sitting in an armchair, watching the rain, and then this scenario came up in my head. Woops.

Sitting on the couch, a hot chocolate in his hands, cuddling with his boyfriend – Those were the weekends he enjoyed. The time off, ignoring the stress, just being yourself. Nothing was more relaxing, nothing was more freeing. Truly, it was one of the few things where he really felt free. Where he did not have to hide who he was. Where he did not have to hide his relationship. God, he wished nothing more than to show everyone that he had a boyfriend, someone he adored, someone he courted. Actually, it was not him who courted anyone, it was him who was being courted. And dang, he loved being the center of attention, but only if it was Kenneth's attention.

“Want more of the hot chocolate?”

Kenneth was an angel. Sometimes, he asked himself if he even deserved a boyfriend like him. Kenneth was always showering him in love. Buying him gifts, cooking, planning romantic dates, treating him like a god. It was perfect, it felt right, for the first time in so many years, he actually felt so much love for another person. It was not just a simple summer fling, a fuck-buddy or something of that sort. It felt like a real relationship.

“No, thank you. Just... cuddle with me, please?”

Because it was. Because it fucking was a real relationship. Kenneth did not want his fame, he did not want to use his body as a stress-relief or as a fuck-toy. Kenneth wanted him. Him and only him. With all his flaws, his imperfections, all the things other people had been turned off by, things he had been dumped for. Not by Kenneth. Kenneth did not care about that kind of stuff. Because Kenneth was one of the good ones.

“Sure thing, Anders. Always.”

Kenneth pulled him closer beneath the blanket, kissing him on his forehead, one hand finding Anders' hand, which was not holding the steaming hot cup. They had been sitting on the couch for quite some time, watching the rain pour down from the sky while a fire was crackling in the wood stove. It had rained the majority of the day, leaving the couple to stay at their cabin, but neither of them had been unhappy about it, because it meant more time for them, more time just being themselves. Anders took another sip from the dark liquid, enjoying the warmth that it was spreading throughout his body.

“I love you.”

It was not a confession, they had told each other that they loved the other person, it was a reassurance. A promise of never leaving him alone. And Anders was fucking grateful for that.

“I love you too, Kenneth.”

Their lips met for a chaste kiss that smelled of chocolate and love. Two things both of them loved. Another kiss followed and another one. Kissing. Something they had to hide from the public eye. Something they had chosen to hide from the public, afraid of what the people would say. Not even their teammates knew about this. Only a few, like Tom and Sigurd, knew about their relationship. It was taking a toll on them, though. Too strong was the desire to kiss after a good jump, too strong to urge to hug the other longer than normal after a bad one. Too many fights occurred, just because they were stressed, stressing about whether someone had seen them or not. Too big the fear of getting caught. The fear of facing hate. The fear of being pushed away. Not even their parents knew about them, knew that they had a relationship, in Kenneth's case even that he was gay.

“What are you thinking about, darling?”

He wanted to go back to normal. He did not want to be stressed out all the time, he did not want to keep this whole thing a secret. He wanted to be free. Free like a bird, if he already tried to fly like one. But now, he felt like he was trapped in a stupid golden cage. Not even golden, probably wooden, cheap, the poorest attempt at holding him safe. Maybe that was why he sometimes felt like he wanted to burn everything down just by saying two words. Two fucking words.

“My boyfriend.”

Making Kenneth's laugh was the best thing. The best thing in the whole world. At least for Anders. Because Kenneth mattered. For the first time in forever, someone truly mattered to him. And he would fight the world for him.

“I heard he's a good guy.”

And Kenneth never failed to make him laugh. Even with the worst jokes, Kenneth managed to crack him up, sometimes even so much that he was left in tears. He just could not do something else than laugh. This man drove him crazy. But in a good way.

“He is, you would like him. Maybe you'll meet him one day.”

“And what should I tell him? 'Hey, I'm the guy fucking your boyfriend? The guy who makes your boyfriend scream another man's name?'”

Anders laughed again, burying his face in Kenneth's chest, his cheeks slightly flushing red.

“You're an idiot, Kenny.”

“Wrong, I'm your idiot.”

The younger one emptied his cup, putting it on the coffee table before looking out of the window again, watching the rain. It was such a contrast to the burning fire. Kind of beautiful. He smiled.

“Let's tell them.”

His voice was quiet, calm, his gaze still fixed on the world outside the window.

“Let's tell the whole fucking world. I'm tired of hiding us. Hiding... you.”

“You know what that means, right? It means... that I have to out myself. Anders... This decision is not yours alone, I have a say in this... And to be fairly honest, I'm not ready.”

Anders looked up at his boyfriend with big eyes, turning around to sit comfortably on his lap. He put a hand on Kenneth's cheek, stroking it gently.

“I understand that, really, and... And I know that it can be hard, but trust me, it's worth it. You know you'll always have a home with me... Or with my parents. If your family isn't accepting, you'll still have us.”

“Sorry, Anders, but... as much as I appreciate it... you would hate it too, losing your family. They can't be replaced...”

The smaller one cuddled closer to his boyfriend, sighing quietly.

“I know... It's... Aren't you done with hiding? Don't you... want to hold my hand... and kiss me? In public?”

“Anders. You don't understand, do you? I am afraid of losing my family. Losing the people I love. I mean, I would love to do those things but... giving up my family isn't worth it.”

He closed his eyes, holding onto his boyfriend, afraid that he would leave.

“I understand it, Kenneth...”

“Doesn't seem like it.”

They watched in silence how the rain got stronger, not moving a bit away from each other, just sitting there, waiting for someone to say something. Anders was the one to give in.

“I'm sorry.”

“You should be.”

“Kenneth.”

“No. Don't 'Kenneth' me. Do you even know what you ask me to do? My fucking God, of course, I want to kiss you, hold your hand, just be me, but you know what? No one fucking cares if you are you. If you feel good. Nobody cares about it. You're gay? Nice for you, faggot, but we don't want to see you here anymore.”

“If nobody cares, why should you care?”

“Because I care about my family. I care about my past and about my future. Our future.”

“And do you care about the present? Because I don't think so.”

Silence fell over them once more, staying longer. Anders' words hat hit Kenneth's heart. Hard. They had made him think. Because, yeah, did he care about the present. He cared about Anders because... he loved him. He loved him as he had never loved anyone before. He wanted to see him happy, but if he had to come out to make him happy... Would it be the right thing? Would it be good for their relationship? Would it survive a coming out?

Their hands had parted, laying on each their side under the blanket. Kenneth let his hand wander over on Anders' side again, grabbing his hand tightly. He slowly freed their hands, guiding them to his lips, kissing every single finger until he found what he was looking for. A smile appeared on his lips as he felt the cold metal on his lips. Of course, their relationship would survive it. Anders showed him so much trust, so much faith, it just had to work out. If it would not, why should he have said yes the day Kenneth had asked him to marry him?

“Let's tell them...”, he whispered against the ring, holding Anders' hand tightly. “Maybe not the whole world at once, but... I actually do want to tell my mom that I'm going to marry the love of my life.”

He could not see how Anders beamed at him, smiling from ear to ear, but he could feel how the younger one hugged him closely, whispering “Thank you”s and “I love you”s. At that moment, it did not matter how his family would react. How the team, how the fans would react. The only thing that mattered was them, their relationship and their faith in each other. Anders would stay by his side, he would not leave him, he would love him 'til the end of their days. Anders was his and he was Anders'. And nothing could change that.


End file.
